https://ayeshaasiddiqi.substack.com/p/advice-how-do-i-feel-again

Love stories are right about love being a transformative healing balm but it’s not one that others can apply for us. Where would they? Who else has access to the site of our injuries except us? “You must love yourself before you can love another” is almost true but not quite accurate either. Because the process of learning how to love oneself (despite one’s self) is ongoing and we’re worthy of love at every step of it. The more accurate, albeit less catchy, way to put it is that before we can engage in romantic love in a way that ensures the emotional safety of all involved we need to be aware of our hurts so we don’t accuse another person of causing what was already there. Or react to it by inflicting the same pain on them or redoubling it on ourselves. We’ll think our partner doesn’t appreciate us when we already had a wounded self belief that said we aren’t enough. We’ll think our partner isn’t being sincere when we’re too wounded to show up authentically etc.

Remove yourself from being affected by the actions of someone who is not considering you when they act.