marvelous mrs maisel 103

34:39 hi, everybody. are you ready for some more music? nice. so, first time at a jazz club, raise your hand. just me? wow. only virgin. losing my virginity to a bunch of jazz musicians, every jewish mother's worst nightmare. anyway, i was outside talking to the guys, and lindsey here whips out his... wallet. what did you think i was going to say? his penis. no. that was already out. so, he pulled out a picture of his really cute baby, very adorable, and then someone asked me if i had kids, and i said yes, and they asked to see a picture, and i realized... i don't have one. i've got two kids. no picture. i've got everything else in the world in my purse. i've got a... look, a-a diners club card, a compact, one, two, three-- three lipsticks, three. two lips, three lipsticks. nail polish, cigarettes, a corn pad, and a kotex sanitary belt. it comes in white now, ladies, so rush right out. i mean, if my kids got kidnapped and i had to describe them, i'd have to say "they look like kids. i-i don't know. the whosit's got a head. the other one's got a... head." [pulls out dr. spock book] anyone know this fucker? dr. spock. i had never read this, not until my son started doing this really weird thing where i wake up and he's staring at me like he's planning things. and-and i'm thinking, "well, right now he's small. i can take him. but in a few years... so i turned to the expert. and one of the things he says is, "trust yourself. you know more than you think you do." are you fucking kidding me? that's his sage advice? "you got this"? trust me, i don't got this. and now, now i'm thinking "a, i could have used the money i spent on this stupid book on a fourth lipstick, and b, what if i wasn't supposed to be a mother? what if i picked the wrong profession? if you're afraid of blood, you don't become a surgeon. if you don't like to fly, you don't join pan am. i-i can't change my mind and donate my kids to the library, like i'm gonna do with this book. [drops] oh, my god, i'm awful. i mean, women are supposed to be mothers. it's supposed to be natural. it comes with the tits, right? the equipment is pre-installed. i mean, are there exceptions? what if some of us are just supposed to travel a lot? or run 24-hour diners out in rural areas wearing coveralls? what if some of us are supposed to just talk to adults our entire life? oh, i never thought about any of this before tonight. ethan's gonna know. he's gonna look at my face when i get home and figure out he has to accelerate the plan. fuck. i thought this was supposed to be a fun evening, filled with music and smoking pot with a bunch of strange men in an alley, and instead i'm filled with dread and doubts and i am starving. why am i starving? do they serve food here? is lenny bruce boring at home? like, at home is he all, "have you seen my red socks?" and then he comes on stage and he's all "i'm going to put a little airplane glue on a rag and fuck, shit, cock, prick." are those pretzels? [leaves stage] mm. delicious. what? you gotta introduce the band! oh, shit! lindsey trent and the hot three! 38:03